Manhood (Part 10) – Man and His Family
We left off last week with a potentially searing question to the heart of every man in relation to his kingdom:
So how is your kingdom? How is the king in you doing? How?s it at your house, in your little realm? What kind of leader are you? Is there a sweet aroma of contentment? Or is your home characterized by the sour taste of bitterness? Are the ?citizens? secure? Is there peace? Is there laughter in the hallways? Is everyone glad to know the king is in his castle? Or would they, frankly, prefer a revolt? Is your home a little taste of heaven, or is it hell on earth?
The answer to this question will indicate the type of leadership (or lack thereof) you have exercised in your home. This comes down to a question of authority and authority seems to be a real sticking point in today’s culture. This is how Stu Weber addresses this question of authority:
Authority is the bottom line of the universe. It is the inevitable first question. Who’s in charge here?! It is the first answer. Rebellion against it started the first war?on a cosmic scale?just as it has started every war since, whether global or local, physical or spiritual, marital or personal. Authority is the one element which, given our self-oriented depravity, chaffs us all. But we will never escape it. And it is particularly incumbent upon Christians to learn to live with it.
Someone is always in charge. It goes without saying. It’s axiomatic. We can try to deny it all we want to, but?someone is always in charge. It’s the way God made this world, because it reflects the reality of His world. And when Satan tried to snatch a little authority for himself, he ended up on the ash heap of the universe.
Someone is always in charge. I don’t remember when I first realized that. But I’m sure it was early in life. Every infant soon learns that someone is charge. It was reinforced at home. It was reinforced again at school. There was no doubt that first day of kindergarten who was in charge. Our teacher, Mrs. Taylor! It was the same at recess; during the lunch hour; on the school bus; and, yes, even in the tree fort in the back yard. Someone is always in charge. It is true on the football team…in the marching band…in the fraternity ?house…and in the corporate board room. It is true everywhere.
Questions to ponder? Do you ever find yourself resenting authority? How does it affect you when you do? Do you resent anyone who doesn?t respect your authority? Do you agree that authority is necessary? If so, why?
Dennis Foley, a highly decorated career soldier tells an interesting story about authority that is both humorous and informative:
He (the NCO) didn’t say a word. We lacked a little coordination and to him we must have looked like the Keystone Kops trying to build a military formation. He made a small gesture of impa?tience.
“Who’s in charge here?” he asked forcefully, tapping his swagger stick against his trouser leg. No one answered.
“I’ll ask again. Who-is-in-charge?” No one answered.
Still standing at a perfect position of attention, he looked each of us in the eye for a split second and began our first class at the NCO Academy. “Everywhere and anywhere you are in the army?someone is always in charge.”
We weren’t sure if that required a response. So we stayed quiet and listened.
“If it isn’t apparent just who is in charge?take charge. Organize and lead. I say again…organize and lead.”
We let that sink in.
Yes, let that sink in, guys. Someone is always in charge. You’ve never been anywhere someone wasn’t in charge. Or if by some chance you were, you didn’t like it very much. It was disorderly and chaotic. This is not only true in the army, it’s true everywhere you will ever go. It’s true in life. It’s true in your home. And the Bible is even more emphatic than that old NCO. When it comes to your home, you are in charge.
So take charge. Organize and lead. A very basic part of being male is taking initiative. Considerately? Yes. Thoughtfully? Yes. Lovingly? Yes. Putting the other person’s interests above your own? Always. But doing it. Leading and organizing?taking responsibility and initiative.
Questions to ponder? Have you ever thought about ?just taking charge? Are you doing that in your home, or are you afraid to? If you have asserted yourself in the leadership role , how is it going and what does it look like?