In our last installment on this topic, we established how critically important the family is for every man. That in the end, his family is his legacy above all else. It would seem that our obligations as men are so high that we will never live up to them.

C. S. Lewis, as always, said it clearly:

It is painful, being a man, to have to assert the privilege, or the burden, which Christianity lays upon my own sex. I am crush­ingly aware of how inadequate most of us are, on our actual and historical individualities, to fill the place prepared for us.

Oh, how right he is. Left to ourselves we are totally inadequate. But “the place prepared for us” is still there, and it must be occupied. As Christian men, we must throw ourselves at the feet of the King of Kings, and beg His wisdom, insight, grace, and blessing. Still, the mantle must be worn. When a man refuses it, everybody is the loser for it.

Whatever our frustration-a culture that bites us, wives who won’t follow us, kids who won’t cooperate with us-we do not have the option of just tossing up our hands and walking away. God-honoring men don’t quit. God-honoring men don’t abdicate, or try to hide in the baggage from God’s anointing, like the pitiful king-designated Saul.

God-honoring men stay at it. And stay. And stay. And stay. Growing and improving. Taking the hits and pushing on down the field. Moving in one direction over the long haul. Many times it’s two steps forward, one back. But it’s still movement; it’s keeping on keeping on.

Read the full story

Yesterday we presented a clear and compelling case for the authority of a man in relation to his wife. Maybe one of the reasons that this has become a frightening concept for most women (and plenty of men) is because of how authority gets abused. But the sort of authority that God is mandating here looks much different than the type most of us are accustomed to. Once again, we’ll let Stu Weber lead us in this discussion…….

There is no room in biblical headship for self-inflated big shots. Still, God’s Word makes it undeniably clear that “the man” is the head of his home. The man is held responsible for the leadership of his marriage and home! The two words that describe his role most basically are “husband” and “head.” These two words are good words—benevolent words—intended to provide our homes with leadership, authority, order, and direction. Rightly understood, they are Camelot-inducing words. If you’ll allow me, I’ll borrow a couple of definitions from my earlier book, Tender Warrior, to nail these terms down.

HUSBAND. The noun form of the word means “manager.” A hus­band is a steward. He is a caretaker and caregiver. He is the man held responsible. In its verb form the word means “to direct, to manage.” Those are strong terms that imply effective and responsible leadership.

HEAD. “Head” means director. It means chief. As in headmaster. Principal. Foremost. “Head” equals leadership and authority, as in the head of the class, head of the military, head of the company, head of the church, head of the home, or head man. Head means head.

Read the full story

Today, we continue on the theme of authority and what that means for a man in relation to his family. Most of us don’t like the concept of authority anymore. We don’t like to follow it, nor, interestingly enough, do most men want to exercise it. It’s just too much work. And in that cultural landscape, we have seen a myth grow into a near “fact-like” status. It is the myth of mutual submission, which really sounds pleasing to the ear and totally reasonable. But it’s really a crock. Here’s how Stu Weber describes it:

“Mutual submission” is not only an oxymoron, it is an impossibility. It exists neither in theory, nor in practice, nor in Scripture.

Read the full story

We left off last week with a potentially searing question to the heart of every man in relation to his kingdom:

So how is your kingdom? How is the king in you doing? How’s it at your house, in your little realm? What kind of leader are you? Is there a sweet aroma of contentment? Or is your home characterized by the sour taste of bitterness? Are the “citizens” secure? Is there peace? Is there laughter in the hallways? Is everyone glad to know the king is in his castle? Or would they, frankly, prefer a revolt? Is your home a little taste of heaven, or is it hell on earth?

The answer to this question will indicate the type of leadership (or lack thereof) you have exercised in your home. This comes down to a question of authority and authority seems to be a real sticking point in today’s culture. This is how Stu Weber addresses this question of authority:

Authority is the bottom line of the universe. It is the inevitable first question. Who’s in charge here?! It is the first answer. Rebellion against it started the first war—on a cosmic scale—just as it has started every war since, whether global or local, physical or spiritual, marital or personal. Authority is the one element which, given our self-oriented depravity, chaffs us all. But we will never escape it. And it is particularly incumbent upon Christians to learn to live with it.

Someone is always in charge. It goes without saying. It’s axiomatic. We can try to deny it all we want to, but—someone is always in charge. It’s the way God made this world, because it reflects the reality of His world. And when Satan tried to snatch a little authority for himself, he ended up on the ash heap of the universe.

Someone is always in charge. I don’t remember when I first realized that. But I’m sure it was early in life. Every infant soon learns that someone is charge. It was reinforced at home. It was reinforced again at school. There was no doubt that first day of kindergarten who was in charge. Our teacher, Mrs. Taylor! It was the same at recess; during the lunch hour; on the school bus; and, yes, even in the tree fort in the back yard. Someone is always in charge. It is true on the football team…in the marching band…in the fraternity ­house…and in the corporate board room. It is true everywhere.

Questions to ponder? Do you ever find yourself resenting authority? How does it affect you when you do? Do you resent anyone who doesn’t respect your authority? Do you agree that authority is necessary? If so, why?

Dennis Foley, a highly decorated career soldier tells an interesting story about authority that is both humorous and informative:

Read the full story

I can’t wait for Sunday at The Grove. Here are a few reasons:

• We had a great crowd for Easter, and will have many of our travelers back home this week. Add in those who are recovering from illness, we may have our largest Sunday of the year this Sunday. That would be great.
• The music rocks….and it means something. Which is the perfect combo for me.
• Plus………..this is where we’re going -

This series picks up after the Rescue and answers the question “What Now?”

• If you have wondered about what happens after you become a Christian….
• If you have wondered about what happens next (or if you’re just curious)…..

Then this series is for you.

We’ll explore subjects such as:

• If you’ve become a Christian, why does God leave you here?
• What’s the strategy that God uses to accomplish the “rescue” of other lost survivors
• What are these things called “spiritual gifts” and what does that mean?
  • IMPORTANT - You will have an opportunity to plug into a small group of people to explore the question of spiritual gifts and discover your own.

Today we continue on our journey of understanding manhood and it’s role as husband / provider / leader. These are critical roles as the family unit us disintegrating all around us. When men do not live out this function of their manhood, their masculinity, they set in motion a ripple effect that can carry forward for years, even generations. Men, we must get a grip on this. Stu Weber describes this as the King pillar in a man’s heart…that servant-leader that God hardwired into our DNA. Let’s join Stu again:

REMEMBER CAMELOT?

Pristine. Pure rivers. Gentle breezes. Stable homes. Safe pathways winding between serene hamlets. Children at play. Happy citizens. The poets called it, “The kingdom of summer.” It was a kingdom at peace.

The king made it happen. Arthur Pendragon, son of Uther, High King of Britain, delivered to his people their paradise. His courage and cunning as a warrior drove the raiding Saxon hordes into the sea. His skills as a negotiator united the petty regional kings, ended the constant bloodshed, and-for the first time since the Legions marched-brought the old Roman colony of Britannia under a single glorious banner. His leadership seemed nearly divine. It was a little bit of life “on earth as it is in heaven.”

Read the full story

For those of you who may have come to the blog yesterday looking for this installment on manhood, I apologize. Yesterday’s schedule didn’t allow me get this posted. But this morning, I will begin looking at the familial role of a man. Once again, I will lean on material from Stu Weber’s “The Four Pillars of a Man’s Heart” with additional comments and/or questions.

According to Weber’s book, there are four distinct roles that all men are designed to live out. This is how he describes it:

Every man is commissioned by his Creator….

• To Provide - as a Servant-King
• To Protect - as a Tender Warrior
• To Teach - as a Wise Mentor
• To Connect - as a Faithful Friend

Read the full story

Today I will conclude my thoughts on manhood and God. Tomorrow we will take on a different angle of manhood (man as husband/provider), but make sure that you are fully grasping this aspect first. I have virtually no building skills, I typically supply the muscle and grunt work. I move stuff around for those who can build. But while I lack those skills, I understand how critically important the foundational work is to any structure. Get that part wrong, and it’s all in jeopardy. As you read today’s entry, go back and review the others about manhood and God….make sure you are establishing a good foundational structure for building authentic masculinity in your life.

One of the elements that is missing far too often among Christian men is a deep, daily walk with Jesus Christ. Mark Alderton (who serves as pastor of Sovereign Grace Fellowship in Bloomington, Minn.) recently described it to men attending a conference this way:

“It is a carryover from the fall that we, as guys, don’t necessarily always want to pursue God ourselves and lead in that way,” he said. “It is very common in a marriage for the wife who is enthusiastic about devotional life and she is consistent in it and wants to bring the man to church.”

Preaching from John 15:4-5, Alderton admonished attendees to abide in Christ, unpacking the concept of “abiding” and encouraging men to answer three fundamental questions:

• What does it mean to abide in Christ?
• Why do we need to abide in Christ?
• How do we abide in Christ?

Read the full story

I’ve had several conversations over the last two weeks about the seeming decline in the importance of Easter among Christians. I’ve been wondering if I’m just missing it, or if it’s really happening. I grew up in the South, which has been known for years as the “Bible Belt”. And it’s true to a large extent. Church is part of the culture of the South. Even those who claim no religious affiliation whatsoever recognize the place of church in southern culture. And for those who are regular church attenders, church and church life often are the hub of life. It is the center point that everything else revolves around. So when Easter arrives, it is THE DAY! When you get down to it, Christmas is an important celebration, but there is no call for it in the Bible. But Easter….. Jesus told us to REMEMBER! Easter is the watershed event in Christianity because it sets Christianity apart from every other faith…because our leader - Jesus Christ - is NOT in a tomb. He rose again. And that is what led to Easter being such a large celebration in the life of the church in the South.

But maybe I’m NOT missing it. Maybe I’m NOT misreading the cultural tea leaves. In Friday’s edition of USA Today, There was an article titled “Has the Notion of Sin Been Lost?” (You can read it here). Rev. Albert Mohler, president of Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, made this observation:

Read the full story

Businesses close. Schools close. It is marked on the calendar and observed carefully by millions of people around the world. So what is it? What is Good Friday all about? Before I answer those questions, let me offer another twist. I’m not convinced that Good Friday is really is Good Friday. I never have been. Why do I say that? Because Jesus Christ gave a recurring hint at how he would prove he was the Son of God. He would be dead for THREE days, and THREE nights. I am no math wizard, but I’ve never been able to count three days and three nights between Friday afternoon and Sunday morning. I think there must be another explanation. And maybe this has bothered you as well. Maybe it’s kept you from connecting the dots. If so, or if you just enjoy deepening your understanding of biblical issues, take the time to read this excellent post (click here to read) examining the problems of “Good Friday.”

With that being said (and hopefully read…you did read the link,didn’t you?), let me add that whether people focus on the work of the cross on Friday, Thursday, or Wednesday, the important thing is that people DO recognize what Jesus did……… FOR YOU! That’s right! “Good Friday” is about YOU! Some of you out there are probably thinking that I have completely lost it….because Good Friday is about Jesus. That’s true in so much as it is the crucifixion of Jesus that we recognize.

BUT WHY WAS JESUS CRUCIFIED?

IT WAS FOR YOU!

No matter who you are, no matter where you are, no matter where you come from, no matter what you have done, Jesus Christ died for you. Everything has a price. And so does sin. In our modern world, sin’s price is often time in jail or fines. In the Old Testament biblical world, the price of sin was death…the death of some sort of unblemished animal to “PAY” for the sin of the guilty party. But it was always a temporary fix. However, it served to point to the need for a permanent solution….a perfect “once-for-all” sacrifice. That was Jesus Christ. He is described in the Bible as a “spotless lamb” and “the lamb that takes away the sins of the world”. His death, His sacrifice, was offered to “PAY” for the sin of all guilty parties….and THAT MEANS YOU! AND IT MEANS ME!

It was the most brutal of deaths. But it was “GOOD” because it is now offered for you and me as a payment for our guilt. Just before Jesus drew his last breath he said, “It is finished!” It was the reason he came. It was the destiny of his life here….to pay a price we could not pay. And we can all apply this payment to our account….IF WE CHOOSE TO! For a more thorough explanation, please proceed to the information on “The Main Thing” page at the top of the blog.

What thrills me most is that Jesus is not still on the cross. There is still something more. And that is what Easter is about. I will add another post on Easter morning as we celebrate this MOST special time of the year.

So how about you? Has it really become “GOOD” Friday for you yet? Has it become “GOOD” news for you yet? It can be…..just say YES!